Thursday, June 16, 2011

Almost 5 Weeks!

It's been a little crazy trying to find a good time to post again on my blog. Parker is adorable, and the last few weeks have been really interesting trying to figure out how to be a mom. Here are some things that I am learning:

1- Patience. It's all about Parker and his schedule, not mine. This means that when I shower, he inevitably will wake up right at the end when I am still dripping wet and trying to get some clothes on. The other day, he decided to wake up when I started making brownies :)

2- Selflessness- Again, it's all about Parker. I am finding that his needs ALWAYS come before what I "need". I can't really explain the feelings that I have when it comes to making sure that he comes first. I just love him so much that I want to do everything that I can to make him happy before I make myself happy.

3- Empathy- To all you other moms out there, how in the world did you do it?? My sisters have kids, and I was so awful in thinking that they could do everything without my mom's help, or anyone's help. It was so nice to have my mom for emotional support those first days home from the hospital. I just didn't understand how difficult motherhood can be, and I know I have a lot more surprises to come!

The first two weeks were the toughest for me. I felt inadequate, scared, and exhausted. Because of the hormones going crazy, I would break down in tears out of nowhere. I would question every decision that I made... "Should I feed him now? Should I change him now? Should I wake him up? Should I put him to sleep?" My brother in law gave me excellent advice: "Make a choice, and don't look back and regret it".

I am feeling much better now. Parker still has times where something is wrong and I can't help him, like gassiness, but I have changed my attitude about things. I am figuring out what kind of things make Parker happy, and what he hates. He is sooo close to smiling! I was talking to him this morning and he sat and cooed back at me, and pulled a face that I swear was a semi-smile. It was so cute :) I am so glad to have him in my life, and I can't wait until that first "real" smile!

Things Parker does best:

1- Poops
2- Eats
3- Makes me laugh with his crazy faces

I'm sure this list will grow eventually, but that's it for now!

Definitely the cutest baby around!

We cannot get him to keep his arms down when we swaddle him.

We went to the zoo and Parker loved it :)